We all know where we are. Unless you're lost. Are you lost? Oh, sure--It's the third light up, turn right, go a few blocks and then turn in where you see the tree. Good luck!
Okay, so NOW we all know where we are, right? But have you ever thought about what where you are looks like from the air? I know they don't affect you in the least, but have you ever thought about the places you're not? How about the imaginary lines that we draw to delineate one place from another--what might those look like if viewed from afar? And how high or low certain places are--who could possibly care about that? Geographers know the answer to this and many other questions about places! So let's get out the Knowledge map (remember how you unfolded it! It goes back a certain way!), set your brain's trip odometer to 0000 (if it isn't there already!), and get ready to find out all there is to know about Geography!
–The highest point east of the Mississippi is 48th Street and 3rd Avenue in New York City! Its elevation is a nosebleed-inducing 410 feet above sea-level!
–The lowest point in the Eastern U.S.? Bring your bathysphere if you're going to 8th Avenue and 4th Street, also in New York City! At 200 feet below sea level, it has been known to spend portions of NYC's Monsoon Season underwater!
–The first recorded use of maps was in 1453, when Pope Pius II, at the time observing a strict vow of silence, drew on a piece of parchment a crude guide directing his cardinals to his secret stash of Latin-language pornography!
–A 'Mesa' is an isolated, relatively flat-topped natural elevation! It's also the name of the new crunchy, chewy, cheesy treat available NOW at your local Taco Bell!
–The term 'climate' refers to the weather conditions of a place or region. For instance, Brazil is a tropical climate, while New York City in August is an scorching, unliveable concrete pit of hellfire!
–Statistical Geographers rate and rank countries on various criteria, including Budget Expenditure, Birth and Death Rate, and Population Density! They then publish these findings in covertly distributed notebooks called "slam books," and use the figures therein to determine who gets to sit at the popular table during lunch and come to the annual IMF slumber party!
–The largest country in the world is Russia, with a land mass roughly one and a half times that of UPN superstar Mo'Nique!
–At last count, there were over 30 countries in the World, with such fascinating and diverse names as Niger, Nigeria, and The Former Yugoslav Republic of Macedonia! Can you name them all? Even if you can, you're probably wrong, thanks to some civil war nobody's ever heard of!
–With a population over 10 million, Sao Paulo Brazil is the second most populous city in the world! However, if you don't count hostages, government-sponsored mercenaries, and child prostitutes (whom are legally 'property'), Sao Paulo is the 547th most populous city, behind Lampasas, Texas!
–The countries of Romania and Chad have exactly the same flags! This is not just because they both shop the clearance bins at K-Mart for their flags, but also because they are actually the same country! Think about it! Do you ever see them together? The country leads a complicated double life, summering in Europe and wintering in Africa! This allows it to dodge UN dues and avoid paying child support to its ex-wife, Guam!
That's it for this time! Our head is spinning from that whirlwind trip around the world! There's so much to find out, 'Learning is Fun' will definitely have to make a return trip to the world of Geography! But it's Friday, so screw it! We've got Margaritas to drink! Until next time, stay smart!
